Best Friends

7th Grade

"Okay class, we will be learning on simultaneous equations today. Now class, turn to page 87..."

I was suppose to listen to Mrs. Joni, but I couldn't concentrate during her classes. My mind would eventually wander off to my 'best friend', Lily. I would sometimes take a small peek at the corner of my eyes just to look at her. Sometimes, I would stare at her for a very long time. Her pretty face, her smooth silky hair which hang just above her waist. I wished she was mine. But she doesn't see me in that kind of way. She didn't like me like that. She just like me as a 'best friend'. I knew that for a very long time.

After class, she walked up to me. "Hey Sam, could you lend me those notes Mrs. Joni gave in class yesterday? I was absent yesterday." I dugged my backpack and took out the papers Mrs. Joni gave the day before. "Here you go, Lily."She took the papers and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks Sam!"And she walked off. My fingers touched the place where Lily kissed me on my cheek. I wanted to tell her, I wanted to tell her my feelings for her. I want her to know that. I want her to know that I didn't to be 'just friends' with her. But I was so shy to do so...I really don't know why.

Junior Year

I was arranging my stuff on my desk when my phone suddenly rang. It was Lily. I answered it, "Hello Lily? Whaddup?" I heard a sob and a sniff. "Lily! Are you okay? Are you...crying?" Another sob. "Matt and I...we...he...he broke up with me..."she mumbled. Matt was Lily's first love. "Lily, are you okay now?" I asked. Another sniff. "Sam, could you...I mean, if you are free, could you come over? I really don't want to be alone..." I hung up immediately. Straight away, I got on my bike and rode over to her place. I found her hugging her pillow and crying on the couch. I sat next to her and comforted her. I stared into her eyes, her beautiful soft brown eyes, wishing so she was mine and mine alone.

After two whole hours of a 'Drew Barrymore' movie and three bags of chips, Lily said she was tired and wanted to sleep.
She looked at me and gave me a small smile. "Thanks Sam..." And she leaned towards me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. On the way back home, I kept thinking. I wanted her to know, my feelings for her. I really wanted to tell her. I don't want to be 'just friends' with her. I love her. But, I'm too shy to tell her that. 'Why am I like that?'I thought.

Senior Year

It was a day before our prom. I was taking some books out from my locker. I saw that familiar brown hair walking towards my locker. "Sam, my date's sick. He can't go..." she said. I remember us saying when we were 7th grade that if neither one of us have dates for prom, we promised to go together, as 'best friends'. And so, we did.

Prom Night

After everything ended, I brought Lily back home. We were standing at her doorstep. I stared deeply into her eyes, grinning. She smiled. 'Should I tell her? My feelings for her? I really wanted her to know. I want her to be mine. Should I kiss her too?' I thought. But I know, she doesn't think of me like that, she just thought of me as her 'best friend'. "I had the best time! Thank you!"she said. She tip-toed and kissed me on the cheek. She opened her front door, and went in. I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know I don't want to be 'just friends' with her. I love her, but, I'm just too shy. And I don't know why.

Graduation day

Time passes so darn fast. A day, a week, then a month. Time flew so fast in a blink of an eye. It was graduation day already. I felt so happy when I saw Lily, with her perfect body floating like an angel on stage, to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she doens't think of me that way, and I know it.

Before everyone went to their own ways, Lily came up to me, in her robe and hat. She was crying. I hugged her tight, not wanting to let go. She lifted her head offf my shoulder. She said, "You are my best friend!" I gave a smile and said, "Thank you..." She leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I wanted her to know that I don't want to be 'just friends' with her. I love her, but I am too shy, and, I don't even know why.

A few years later

I'm in my best suit and tie. Sitting on the pews of the church. A church she is getting married at. She's so beautiful. In her white dress with a long train, and the veil. I hear her say 'I do'. I watched her drive away, away to her new life. She's married now, married to another man, not me. How much do I wanted her to be mine, but, she doesn't see it that way, and I know that. Before she drove away, she came to me and hugged me tight. "You came! Thank you so much!"and she kissed me on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I wanted her to know that I didn't want to be 'just friends'. I love her too much, but, I'm too shy.

Many Years Passed

I was at the same church again, sitting on the same pews. But this time is not a wedding, but a funeral. I looked down, into the coffin, staring at the beautiful girl, who used to be my 'best friend'. During the service, they were reading one of Lily's diary entry during her high school days. It read:

"I stare at him, I really wanted him to know, how I felt for him. I wanted him to know, that I don't want to be 'just friends'. I wanted to tell him, but I'm just too shy. I really don't know why. I really wished he would tell me he loves me."

I couldn't hold my tears any longer. I ran out from the service. I cried. I wished that I did too. I wished that I told her I loved her, too. Tears and tears of sadness and regret came like there's no tomorrow. 'Why didn't I tell her when I had the chance? Why didn't I tell her I loved her? All these years...'I thought.